As some of you know, my parents are leaving to start their latest journey. My dad has been gone for about 5 months now, making sacrifices that are beyond words and now has come the time for my mom to join him. Although we've tried to prepare ourselves for this time over the past few months, I am no where near ready for this change in my life. My keyboard is flooded with tears as I type these words, my momma is'a leavin'. It's so bizarre, I've known that this was coming but I don't think I really understood how I would handle it when it arrived. My heart has been hurting since my dad left but reality is, we've all dealt with it and we still had my mom here to keep us sane. Don't get me wrong, my dad is the other half of me, and I miss him each day. I've even found myself avoiding him just so I didn't have to feel these feelings. My dad is the rock of this family, he always has been, and it is that very reason I knew that the decision he was making was right. While he is our rock, my mom is our heart. She is the fuel to this family, she is the truest piece to this puzzle. She is so amazing, so creative, so funny, so tender, so sweet, so sincere, so perfect. Yes, my mom is perfect, and she really and truely is my very best friend. How does one live without their very best friend? Who am I going to call when I want to run a quick errand to Sam's Club (secretly knowing that we'll end up at JC Penny's)? Who do I call when I need help hanging decorations because I just can't do it the same way she can? Who do I call when I need help picking out flowers, and for the cheapest price? Where do I go when I need to get away? There are times that the only reason my butt gets out to run is to see what Shell is up to. Where am I going to go to steal a can of soup for lunch or a roll of TP cause I forgot? I know that there are a million answers to these questions, and I know that there are many of loved ones that are going to be our support, but I'm sorry, you just aren't my mom. You can try, and I know you will, I know that we will be given love and we will still laugh and live our lives, but I can also guarantee that it wont be the same.
I recently stumbled upon this quote and of course it brought me to tears, and now, to my knees.
"A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path"
This quote can be read and interpreted in any way that you like, but the way I read it was like this... My mom has been given an opportunity, and yes, it is an opportunity. No matter how much my heart hurts or how bad I hate the opportunity, it is a good one and I'm proud of my dad for seeking it. For challenging our will and our love. This has done nothing but test and strengthen our family and the love that we have for each other. Anywho, my mom is taking a different path, and although different, it doesn't mean that it is the wrong one. My mother deserves a new path, as long as she remembers her way back home, and I know she will. At the end of the day, there is nothing that has ever come between the love I have for my mother, and let me tell you, Houston sure as hell won't either! I love you mom, I am so proud of you and although I can't quite wrap my mind around this, I know you are doing all of this because you love us. You need to learn a few things Shell, do it to.
"If God lead you to it, he will see you through it"
Love you Momma
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